Dan Says

I hate Mr. Sub. I hate everything about them. I hate their subs, I hate their commercials, I even hate their name. Mr. Sub? Really? It sounds like a three year-old came up with it fresh out of nap time.

First of all, their subs suck. Who would think you can screw up meat and bread, but they managed to. When you go to Subway you think to yourself that it would probably taste just as good if you went to the grocery store and grabbed lunch meat and a sub bun, but you let it slide. But with Mr. Sub, you can’t. I’ve had enough of their shit. And by shit, I mean their subs.

Secondly, and most importantly, I hate their commercials. Who comes up with these? I’ve heard that Salvia was the new drug of choice, but I didn’t realize that they meant with marketing professionals. Not only does it not make me want to buy their subs, but it makes me specifically want to NEVER buy a sub from there. Ever. In fact, it makes me want to buy a sub from Subway and walk in there, explain to them why they suck, and eat the sub in front of them out of spite. Then after, tell them that their subs make good people do bad things, and smash a window.